Stereotypes
by Morte Mistrata
Summary: Pearl notices something wrong with Peridot and wonders if it means that they may have shared a similar past. Meanwhile, she struggles with the invading memories of Rose. Peridot tries to figure out what to do in her first relationship. Amethyst struggles with homesickness and the strange feelings that she can't get rid of while Lapis deals with the after effects of Malachite.
1. Pearl

It didn't take long for Pearl to realize that Peridot didn't like weapons. As the monster ran towards her, panic crossing her face, it didn't come to mind at all that Peridot wasn't going to summon her weapon. After all, it was basically a reflex for her after all of these years. The thing ran towards the green gem, teeth rotating in its mouths. The thing rose up on it's hind legs as Peridot cowered, hands covering her gem. She shrieked.

Pearl stabbed one attacking her before turning to help the newest Crystal Gem. She raise her spear just as the monster lunged, managing to bite her left arm and shoulder. Her screaming was heartier now, inspired by pain. Pearl's aim was on target though, managing to kill it before it could strike twice. It fell limp beside Peridot before poofing, it's gem falling to the ground.

Pearl bubbled it before kneeling over her. Peridot hid her face in her good hand, the other one flickering in and out of existence.

As Pearl placed her hand on her shoulder, she jerked away. Her eyes were wide again with fear, tears simmering as if afraid to fall.

"Poof me, Pearl! Do it quick!" Peridot cried. Pearl nodded, standing up and thrusting her spear deep into her chest. Her mouth opened, though she didn't scream and then she was gone. Retreated into her gem.

Garnet ran over, Amethyst not far behind.

"What happened? I heard Peridot scream." Garnet said, the question already answered by the small gem cradled in Pearl's hands.

Amethyst frowned, pulling down Pearl's arm so that she could see. "Wonder if that was her first time though. You think she knows what to do, P?"

Pearl frowned. "She should, she asked me to…" He voice trailed off. Though they had done so for each other many times before, it hadn't been easy to finish off a teammate. "She asked me to 'poof' her. One of them got her before I could kill it, got her arm badly."

Garnet nodded. "At least Steven wasn't here to see it. Let's bring her back to the temple, keep an eye on her until she regenerates."

Amethyst nodded, satisfied and starting walking back before shapeshifting into bird. As she disappeared into the distance, Garnet put a firm hand on Pearl's shoulder, stopping her from following the younger gem.

"You didn't finish." Garnet said, crossing her arms and waiting. Pearl shifted her weight, eyeing the shining gem in her hands.

Quietly, she spoke. "She didn't even try to defend herself from it. Just stood there and let it attack her. I don't get it. She's so...spunky; It's not like her to just roll over without a fight."

Garnet didn't reply right away, instead starting to walk again. After a few minutes of silent contemplation, she replied. "I think you'd have experience with it. Consider that you both were from similar castes and backgrounds. I think that will supply your answer." She stopped at the door, slipping inside her room before Pearl could think of a reply.

OoOoO

It was nearly a week before Peridot regenerated. Pearl did not sit by and watch her eagerly as Steven might have done. But that didn't mean that she wasn't on Pearl's mind. She considered her own experiences back on Homeworld. As a servant, a pretty plaything. She hadn't really expected Homeworld to change all that much in that aspect. She was a plaything for her owner, whoever her Diamond deemed worthy of possessing her at a given moment. Generally a quartz who had done well received her.

Her fifteenth owner was Rose, the first to ask her for permission, the first to make her feel like she was someone instead of something. She had taught her how to do things that few in her caste knew how to do, like use the data instead of just processing it, or summoning her weapon. Had anyone taught Peridot how to do that?

Just then, the room was enveloped in light as Peridot reformed. She did not come peacefully. She came with a scream, stopping abruptly as she realized that she was okay. She fell to the ground with a sob, barely giving Pearl time to notice the new stars on her knees or the small star on her chest where a diamond used to be.

 _She looks good with stars._ Pearl thought as she dropped the book Steven had asked her to read.

Peridot lifted her head suddenly, shying back from Pearl's touch before allowing herself to be enveloped in a hug. Pearl softly patted the young gem's hair as she calmed down. Finally she pulled back, sniffling.

"I am...sorry for the trouble I have caused. I'm just a stupid peridot; I should not have gotten in the way." Peridot said, all signs of her distress gone. Pearl wanted to say something else, wanted to ask her if what she thought was true, but said nothing as she walked outside, ready to bombard the returning Steven with questions and requests for more Camp Pining Hearts tapes.

OoOoOo

Steven had the amazing ability to corral all four of them into watching a movie together, even though it was incredibly cheesy and stupid, if Pearl was to say so truthfully. She was painfully aware of Peridot, curled up as small as she could be between Steven, who was in Garnet's lap and Amethyst, who was snuggling into Pearl's side. She asked questions throughout the movie, questioning the logic of certain characters and their decisions. As Dogcopter started to fight the villainous Blimpcats, his obviously impossibly large guns shooting at them, Peridot shied away, hiding her face in Amethyst's hair.

She didn't look up until the movie was over, nearly half an hour later. Pearl stayed behind as they slowly separated, Garnet putting Steven to bed, Amethyst going to her room. Peridot stayed still, not moving her position from how Amethyst had softly pried her off.

"You don't like weapons." Pearl asked quietly, watching Peridot carefully.

The green gem slowly uncurled, looking up apprehensively. "That's not a question. How do you expect me to respond?"

Pearl gazed back at her, noting the timidness in her body language, the subtle quietness in her voice. She crossed her arms, unfazed. "Why?"

Peridot glared back, though she relented quickly under Pearl's unblinking eye. "For what reason would I like objects made to hurt others? My job is to use information. I am a data clerk, I emerged into a caste of thinkers. Logically there is no reason for me to like them."

Pearl quietly listened, watching Peridot's eyes and the way that they avoided meeting hers directly. Her green hand fidgeted as she answered, a small gleam of sweat covering her face.

"I think both of us know that's not true." She replied. "When you and Jasper first landed here, you shied away from the gem disrupter. And when you moved into Steven's bathroom you continually asked if things were weapons."

"I do not understand your line of reasoning." Peridot replied, standing up. She stretched and waited for Pearl to dismiss her before leaving. Her manners were improving to a point, but Pearl knew that she'd leave if she didn't get to the point.

"You were a toy."

Peridot's expression changed, hardening, and pushing any civility out of it. She tensed, her form puffing up in a primal way to make her look bigger. Pearl recognized this as one of the programmed instincts that gems of her caste had to make them...more fun to use. This small amount of backbone would have been beaten out of her by now if she'd have been at Homeworld longer. The thought made Pearl cold to think that the small crystal gym would be like she was, with no one to save her.

"And? I was a toy. I was _used_ and _abused_ and _taken._ So what? I can't change what happened in the past and neither can you!" Peridot yelled, hurt in her eyes as she backed out of the room. As soon as she finished, she ran away towards the barn.

OoOoOoO

Pearl considered what had gone wrong. It was simple in hindsight. She was too blunt, with no real objective. Normally it was who had no tact.

Garnet said nothing at their awkward confrontations. Peridot refused to speak more than necessary, keeping her replies short when Pearl asked a question. Steven was oblivious thankfully, but the other two members of the Crystal gems were not. Amethyst cornered Pearl one day as they were on a mission together.

"Is there a reason why you and Peri are bein' awkward, because it's _really_ awkward." She had said as she crossed the gorge. Pearl followed behind her, preferring to jump gracefully over the gap than swing across as Amethyst had done.

"What do you mean? We're not-" She paused as she crossed over the next one. "Nothing is wrong."

No one said anything else about it.

Pearl, however, was getting tired of it. She walked up to the barn, not announcing her presence as she walked in. Peridot was laying down in front of the tv, head in her arms. She was so focused, she didn't even notice Pearl walk in, through the floor was awfully creaky.

"Peridot?"

The green gem jumped, the movement causing her to fall from the loft onto the ground. Pearl reached over to help her up, causing Peridot to shy away from her touch, a scowl on her face.

"I don't need your pity Pearl." She growled.

Pearl froze, anger bubbling up inside her. She had only been trying to help this whole time. Why did she have to make it hard for her to simply tell her that she'd been in the same place? That she too could defend herself. That she was safe now. But instead of doing the logical thing and simply saying it, she found herself giving into her 'heart'.

She leaned forward, one hand reaching behind Peridot to support her, the other one beside her on the wall. Their lips met for a brief moment, gems touching together with a small tap. Pearl shivered at the unexpected cool of her skin and the heat of her gem. And then her face was stinging.

Peridot pushed the stunned Pearl away from her, her face a darker green. "And what the diamond was _that_ for?"

Pearl blushed. What she did was uncalled for and definitely not the answer. The only passion Peridot had likely experienced was at her expense and not fun. Pearl cleared her throat and continued with what she should have done all along.

"I actually came to apologize for being so blunt. I only meant to tell you that I know how it is...was for you. You know how to regenerate, but you've never even summoned your weapon. The day you poofed...I realized that….I don't want you to get hurt. I came here to offer to help you learn to summon your weapon." She averted her eyes. "I'm sorry for kissing you. That was uncalled for and-" Pearl was cut off as a pair of cool lips pressed to her own, small hands tugging her down, even as Peridot stood on her tip toes.

She let herself melt in the kiss, letting that eternity become a bigger one as she moved her mouth slightly, allowing a small space for her tongue to slip through. Peridot fell down slightly as her legs grew tired, finally breaking the kiss.

"It's not the kiss that I minded. Perhaps I might even enjoy performing that action again." She said, the blush still fading from her face. "And thank you Pearl. I would like to learn."


	2. Amythyst

Amethyst didn't really have an opinion on Lapis yet. They had fought a while back, but then Lapis had helped them with Jasper. There wasn't much time for any real interaction. Of course, this was her chance to flaunt the fact that she was no longer the newest crystal gem, which inevitably led her to the barn.

"Yo. Anybody home?" She called as she stepped into the dim and creaking barn. The hole in the wall was still there, though Peridot had fixed it marginally with tarp and duct tape. It gave just enough light for her night vision to stay deactivated.

A blue form writhed in the corner of the barn, a low muttering sound reaching Amethyst's ears. She walked forward, unsure if she was intruding but also not really caring. "Ya hear me? P-dot, you in here?"

She looked around as she approached Lapis, noticing that the barn was empty except for them. Lapis appeared to have been sleeping, as she was wrapped in Steven's blanket and two pillows were nearby, but she wasn't sleeping now. Her eyes were open, though they appeared to be unseeing as she fought something that Amethyst couldn't see the best she could while still wrapped in the blanket.

Amethyst was about to leave to get Pearl or Garnet, who were much more suited to such a task when she heard her whimper. "We don't … be Malachite anymore." She turned back, kneeling beside her to hear better. "Stop hurting me."

Carefully, Amethyst tried to untangle the blanket from around her, but ended up just ripping it off. Now that she was less constricted Lapis calmed down a bit, though she continued to mutter about Malachite and the scared expression on her face did not leave.

Back when Amethyst first joined the Crystal gems, she had often experienced her own nightmares. She could still remember the desolate emptiness of the Kindergarten, the way each hole had gawked at her as she frantically searched for someone, anyone. Back then, once she had tired herself out the only thing that she could do to escape the emptiness was sleep. When she finally left, the nightmares invaded. Normally someone would wake her up, either by talking to her until she did, or in the worst situations, stimulating her gem until she woke up.

The issue was that her voice did not have any connection to her that might spark her conscience. If she did, the yelling when she came in would have roused her already. That left her gem. Though Amethyst hadn't really understood it when she had first been found by Garnet and Pearl, apparently a gem was something personal, not to be touched without permission. Though it was excusable back then, it definitely wouldn't been seen as a mistake or something to laugh about to Lapis; her recent escape from Malachite was obviously still haunting her.

A loud crash outside cause Amethyst to look up. A few water figures were cowering beneath a large but not totally life sized depiction of Malachite. The image shook Amethyst all the way through to her gem. She didn't hesitate. Amethyst flipped her over, trying to be careful but with her frantic movements, she ended up dropping her on the floor with a loud smack. She squatted over her back for a better position, then raised her hand. Her hand froze over Lapis' gem before she pressed her fingers to it. She started to stroke it, trailing the shape of it, her movements at first uncertain, then growing more confident as Lapis stopped struggling.

Amethyst could feel the small hairline crack that marked where her gem had been mended, so small that not even her specially attuned eyes had caught notice of it until now. As she traced the outline of it, carefully grazing where it met her skin, she noticed how smooth it was compared to her own. Her gem was strongly faceted, sharpened where they met, which was normal for a gem made for war. It was much more...rough compared to Lapis' gem.

"What are you doing?" Lapis asked quietly, her sudden consciousness surprising Amethyst. SHe hadn't even noticed that she had stopped struggling. Her hand froze as she fell back, causing Lapis to wince as her lower back held much of her weight. Quickly, she moved off of her.

"You were having a nightmare Lapis." She shrugged. "I woke ya up."

Lapis peeled herself off of the floor, staring at Amethyst so long that she began to feel uncomfortable. Just as she started to leave, she spoke, her eyes wavering behind her bangs.

"Thanks Amethyst."

OoOoO

Amethyst didn't have time to come back and visit again for another few weeks as a sudden outbreak of corrupted gems started. She and Pearl were in and out of beach city, barely staying long enough to say hello to Steven before heading out again.

They were on the sixth when Amethyst decided to bring up the incident with Pearl. Amethyst surveyed their surroundings as the warp pad deposited them. The ground shimmered beneath them and Amethyst was unsure if it was natural or a battleground left untouched. The sky was an ominus purple that nearly matched the hue of her skin. She kept her eyes on the sky and not on what or rather who she was walking on. As they walked through the desolate gem relic, she thought back to when she had walked in on Lapis.

"Pearl, do you remember when I used to have nightmares?" She asked, breaking their comfortable silence.

Pearl looked at her from the corner of her eye, surprised by the line of questioning. " Of course I do. I spent many of those nights with you. Why do you ask?"

Amethyst said nothing as they jumped over a deep gorge. She swore that she saw something inside, but Pearl had said something about it being attracted to water so she said nothing.

"Well? I know you well enough to know that you always have a follow up question." Pearl said as she pushed overgrown plants out of her face. Amethyst ducked under it, and rubbed her arm.

"Lapis was having a nightmare. I walked in on it and tried to wake her up like you guys used to do." Amethyst replied, pausing as she noticed a sudden movement in the bushes behind them. She waited until she was sure that it wasn't their monster before continuing. "I had to touch her gem to do it."

Pearl stopped for a moment, trying to hide her surprise as caution for the noise. "You did remember what we said about...I mean, how did she react?"

Amethyst stopped again, her whip lashing out to hit a spider-like creature as it jumped at them. "She said thanks."

"That was it?" Pearl asked quietly as she knelt to bubble the gem.

"That's it." Amethyst replied.

OoOoO

Amethyst frowned as she stared at the farm house. It's stupid inhabitant was making her think more than she cared to. She was rash. She was reckless. And with that mantra running through her mind, Amethyst starting walking towards the now familiar structure.

As she approached the barn, her eyes automatically searching the area for danger and other obstacles, she noticed the pond water rippling, water growing higher and higher to form waves familiar to the ones that she saw last time. Quickly, she rolled down the hill, stopping at the edge of the pond. Two figures grew from the water, dripping until they formed the precise forms of Lapis and...herself. She watched as she spun Lapis in a delicate way before dipping her down for a passionate kiss. As they continued to dance, Amethyst sat down on the edge and watched with rapt attention as their romantic display continued.

Did Lapis really think of her this way? As a potential partner, not just for dancing, but for more intimate things. Amethyst briefly touched her lips, wondering how the blue gem's would feel against them. Finally, the dancing pair melted back into the lake. Amethyst didn't move as she watched the water calm, even as she heard light footsteps on the grass behind her.

Lapis sat down on the grass beside her, her long feet splashing in the water. She leaned back on long slender arms. Not that Amethyst notices or anything.

"I'm guessing that you were watching my dream. I mean, a still lake isn't that interesting." Lapis said, looking at Amethyst from the corner of her large eyes.

Amethyst wondered if there was a specific reason why she moved a little closer to the blue gem, or if Lapis even recognised that she leaned closer too.

"Yeah. It was awesome. P does that too."

There was a pause, then a cautious "Peridot?"

"Heh. No. I forgot that there's two 'P's now. I meant Pearl." Amethyst amended.

Lapis finally turned to face her. Amethyst could feel her gaze as she also turned, surprised to find how close their faces were.

"Did you mind it?" Lapis asked, her breath warming Amethyst's face.

Amethyst Quartz abilities were all on now. Hypersensitive hearing. Super-detailed sight. And of course, her skin and gem were very sensitive too.

"Not at all." She replied.

Before she could say anything else, Lapis leaned in pressing her cool blue lips to Amethyst's. Amethyst used one hand to pull her closer, the other to support them both as she dipped her backwards.

As they broke apart the kiss, Lapis smiled shyly as Amethyst beamed. "So how was that for a dream come true?"

"Perfect." Lapis breathed, pecking her cheek.


	3. Peridot

Peridot knew how shattered she'd be if this was Homeworld. Romantic expression between low caste gems was against regulations; if a gem had an allegience to someone other than their diamond, it could compromise their work. Therefore, only high caste gems were allowed close interpersonal interactions. But on Earth, it was different. Love was encouraged, expression of it even more so. And Pearl had expressed some of those romantic emotions to her. Through kissing. And it had even felt good.

She stared through the hole in the wall at the setting sun. She really needed to fix that. Peridot looked at her hand. She wondered if it hurt Pearl when she slapped her. Did she even want it to have hurt her? Why was she even second guessing herself? Peridot had already said that she didn't mind it, and that in itself was true. She kicked at a pillow laying hapsardedly on the ground. She felt big, and small at the same time. Then what was it? What was wrong?!

And then she realised. She hadn't only liked _it,_ she had liked _her_ as well. Even if she had to stand on her tip toes to reach her face. Especially if she had to.

That relevation wasn't exactly comforting. How did relationships even progress? Were there steps she had to follow, regulations to be aware of? Without any parameters to operate within, she didn't know how to proceed, which would ineveitably lead to her freezing up. The same action that had exiled her off Homeworld in the first place. She sighed, remembering the strange warmth that Pearl had permeated. It was unnatural to their kind to be warm, a useless waste of energy. Yet, she liked it. Why did she like it? She sighed. She was much too ignorant without any information on the subject and ignorance was useless. So Peridot decided that it was time to study.

OoOoO

"Steven." Peridot said, leaning over his face. His eyes were closed, and he was emitting a strange buzzing sound.

"Huh?" He sat up quickly, hitting his head on Peridot's visor. She fell back, stumbling until she caught her balance again. She rubbed her throbbing gem as Steven whisper-yelled, "That hurt." He rubbed his head for a moment, his eyes opening wider the longer he sat waited for him to acknowledge her. "Peridot! What are you doing here at…" He turned his head to look at the time recorder on the side of his bed. "Three in the morning?"

Peridot tilted her head to the side. The last time that she was here so late, Pearl had made her leave, explaining how humans had to sleep to function correctly. She would've waited until a late hour, but this was urgent. "I need to do research on something."

Steven pulled the cover higher and rolled away from her. "Can't it wait until the morning?"

"No it can't wait until the morning! It's very important, Steven. Please." She said, her voice growing quieter on the last word. She didn't want to wait until tomorrow. She might see Pearl tomorrow and then what? She might not have future vision as Garnet did, but that didn't mean that she couldn't forsee herself messing up what ever this could be.

Steven sighed as he searched through the junk on the side of the bed, throwing a few humanoid plastic men across the room until he finally produced a flat black square. He pressed a button on the side and it lit up, white light illuminating the room. Peridot leaned foward, intrigued by the technology as Steven leaned away from the light.

"Use this and _please_ let me sleep." He rolled over again. A few moments later loud buzzing leaked from under the blanket. Quickly climbing down from from the loft, she sat down on the couch and began to read. As much as she'd like to do this research back at the barn, she knew that there was little chance of the signal reaching all the way there. Quietly, she began to read.

OoOoO

Peridot jumped slightly when Steven appeared beside her, looking over her shoulder. She didn't know why, but she felt like she should hide the screen. That was stupid thought; Sharing information with better informed collegues led to information gain, so hiding her findings wouldn't get anywhere.

"So what was so important that you had to wake me up in the middle of the night?" Steven asked, pulling the edge of the screen down. His eyes widened. "Is there a reason why you're looking up relationship advice?"

Peridot's face burned. Now she wished that her visor was opaque like Garnet's so that she could hide behind it. "Of course there is. Nothing happens without a reason, Steven." She replied, scrolling down the page. An image of two women kissing popped up on screen along with a caption saying, "Sometimes double the x chromosome is better than one."

Her face got hotter. As Steven slowly looked up at her, a big smile on his face. "Is that reason...that you have a crush on one of the gems?"

She didn't have a chance to reply when he jumped up, yelling, "Oh my gosh, you do!" He plopped back on the couch. "Who?"

Peridot was hating her new modification. Though being warmer was supposedly normal for living organisms on this planet, it was still strange to her. Having a cold form temperature was supposed to help the gem to work better, allowing for faster data circulation. It was normal to her, and she was used to growing colder when she was embarressed, not warmer. Everytime she blushed, which was increasingly more, her face was getting hot.

"Steven? Maybe you should give Peridot a break. It looks like she's been up all night."

Steven looked up and nodded, the smile never leaving his face as he walked into the kitchen in search of fuel. Pearl chuckled as she walked ahead, pausing at the door. "Come with me?"

Peridot nodded, her face still warm (or was it growing warmer?), as she followed her onto the beach. The beach wasn't a favorite place for Peridot, as she found it hard to not remember the circumstances of the first time she had seen it. It was when she was fleeing her ship, trapped in a claustrophobic escape pod, that she had first seen it, ableit in a blurr. It still brought to mind the emotions of that day, even now in Pearl's company.

Pearl slowed down her pace so that Peridot wouldn't have to run to keep up with her. Pearl glanced down at her, a small smile playing on her lips. "So I happened to overhear that you like one of the gems."

Peridot looked away from the taller gem's face. Her skin was so delicately white, even though she was probably the scariest and least delicate gem on Earth (behind Garnet of course). Stupid heat mod.

"So you did. Is there a question in that statement?" Peridot replied, careful to keep her voice even and calm as the website told her to. Confidence is key. Rule 31 of the Finding a relationship handbook.

Pearl chuckled, this time a bit of nervousness audible to Peridot as she listened. "True. I meant to ask," She hesitated, looking out at the broad expanse of the sea. Peridot kept looking straight ahead, preferring not to see the large expanse of water. Frankly, it still startled her sometimes. "I meant to ask if that gem was me."

Peridot froze. What was she supposed to do now? The Finding a Relationship handbook said to stay aloof, while the How to fall in love guide said to confess. Pearl was staring at her and she felt the pressure to say something build. Finally, she blurted, "Gay."

Pearl laughed. "What?"

Peridot felt like she was melting, her face so hot it could could Steven's nutrition. "I-I-I uh, I mean, I uh," Peridot didn't know what to do, so she did the same thing that Pearl did the last time that she needed to be shut up. She stood on her tip toes, one hand lightly grasping the side of her face as the other rested on Pearl's shoulder for balance. Carefully, she tilted her head and pressed her lips to Pearl's the warmth not as noticeable as it was last time.

They broke apart reluctantly. Pearl smiled. "When did you get warm?"

Peridot bit her lip. "Last night, I researched the problem. Isn't warm natural on Earth, isn't it supposed to be desirable?"

Pearl smiled and offered her hand. Peridot carefully slipped her hand into it, noticing how small her hands were compared to Pearl's. "Well that explains the 'gay' then." She giggled as they continued down the beach.


	4. Lapis

Lapis was old enough to remember a time before colonization, when Homeworld was just home. Back then, romance was much more common and of course, less taboo. After that was the Age of acceleration, or as most of the older gems called it, the Age of destruction, named after the large amount of crushed gems. She'd had a few romantic relationships during that time, but none had been with warrior caste gems such as an ameythst. But her attraction to her had not come as a surprise. Lapis had always had a greater attraction for quartz, but as those relationships were taboo, she had always stuck to gems such as pearls.

Lapis stared at the gem made lake as she waited for Amethyst to make her daily trip up to the barn. She really had nothing else to do when she wasn't with her. Peridot had tried to rope her into watching some human visual entertainment called Camp Pining Hearts, but Lapis had found it dull. Just like almost everything else. She still slept, but she knew what she was doing wasn't healthy. All that was left to do was to think and wait and watch; all of which was just fine with her most of the time.

"Sup Lapis? What you do all day?" Ameythst said as she dropped down beside her, leaning back. A few crumbs clinged to her shirt and a brown smear ran across her cheek.

"You've got stuff all over you. What is that?" Lapis asked, ignoring her question. What could she say; that she waited for her all day?

Amethyst looked surprised before bringing a hand up to her cheek. She looked at her finger and laughed. "It's chocolate. Try some." She lifted her finger to Lapis' mouth. Trust wasn't something that Lapis gave willingly, but she figured that she could allow this much. She licked the chocolate.

A sweet, slightly bitter taste filled her mouth and she smiled. "Tastes good."

"But not as good as me, right?" Amethyst asked mischeviously, pressing her lips softly onto Lapis' cold ones.

Lapis smiled as she shifted, allowing Amethyst to pull her closer. "Of course not. There's nothing sweeter than you." She replied, a familiar ache subsiding as the warmth of another gem heated her form.

OoOoO

When she slept, Lapis would remember being Malachite. As easy as it would be to avoid the memories, she would still fall asleep because of a tiny little fact that she hated to admit to: She missed her. As terrible as Malachite had been, she had been strong; she had been...the opposite of lonely. And it was only in her dreams that she got to be her again.

It was with the promise of seeing her again that Lapis pulled the blanket tighter around her and closed her eyes.

They were underwater, deep in the thickly cold grasp of Lapis' counterpart, they watched. They waited. An earth creature, large and black, swam by. It sang a mournful song as they smiled, sharp teeth unseen to the creature. They lunged, catching the creature between it's teeth. Blood flowed down their throat, diluted by the salty water. Oh how they loved the hunt. The way the creature struggled in their grasp, unable to escape. They loved the feeling of their strength, even as one of them tried to escape. As they released the dead creature from their mouth, they forced her back down, deep inside.

"Lapis?" A voice called distantly. It sounded like a young boy, though she couldn't remember his name.

What was that? The word sounded familiar. It was a name, wasn't it? WIth it came memories, memories that weren't theirs, but somehow still belonging to them.

The blue one was smiling as she helped to terraform the planet, raising the large body of water away from the indigenous species that depended on them. Her diamond was watching safely from the sky arena as the planet was reformed into her image. The scene was confusing and it was hard to focus on any one thing, but somehow, she had managed to catch the eye of one of them. The creature, called a Malvine, if she remembered correctly, was gasping for water, it's pretty aquamarine skin was quickly drying out. She let a drop of water fall. The creature tried to smile at the gesture, probably expecting more. Lapis, that was the blue one's name, did not provide any. She watched as the Malvine suffocated, green internal liquid oozing through the cracks of it's skin.

The memory washed away. Jasper's mirroring memory came foward afterwards. This was much more personal, Malachite thought as Jasper headbutted an Obsidian, shattering her gem with a single strike. Another gem, a chalk, tried to attack her and she laughed. They were weak enough to be shattered with a push and Jasper did just that. But not before she managed to throw her knife at her, slicing a cut up to her elbow. The pain was invigorating, With a smirk playing on her lips, she charged another and another, until the ground was littered with shards. Though her Diamond had ordered her to only kill when needed, she knew that she would be pleased.

The memory faded as her eyes followed the carcass to it's resting place by her feet. More rested there beside her.

As Lapis opened her eyes for real this time, she felt a familar ache that Jasper had once filled. It hurt. It had felt so real. With a sigh, she stood up and walked outside to meet Steven.

OoOo

Lapis wasn't sure if she really liked Amethyst. She enjoyed spending time with her. She looked foward to seeing her every day. But every night, sometimes even sooner, she'd fall asleep with _her_ on her mind. And it had her feeling guilty. She wondered if it was visible, noticable to Amethyst, because it wasn't her intention to hurt her, though she knew that she was. Everytime that she pushed her away, rejected holding her hand or a kiss to the cheek, she did so because she wasn't the right quartz.

As Steven dragged her into his home, the video box flashing pictures that the others seemed to be only partially paying attention to. Peridot was sitting on the floor, curled up next to Pearl who was leaning a little into her touch. Garnet was lying on the bed with Amethyst beside her, an open space beside her. Steven climbed on top of the bed and splayed himself across Garnet's lap as Lapis sat down beside Amethyst. Crossing her legs, she leaned against the headboard, head resting on Amethyst's shoulder as the movie played on. From what she could tell, the film was about an earth creature called a dog that could fly. She didn't pay much attention to it though; intead, she focused on Amethyst. She noticed the way that she kept glancing back at Lapis; the way that she couldn't figure out whether or not to hold Lapis hand or leave it alone; and worst of all, the way that she looked when Lapis finally left, leaping lithely over her and Garnet so that Steven wouldn't notice that she was gone.

It was only a few moments later that Amethyst joined her outside, sitting beside her on the stairs.

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No." Lapis answered truthfully.

"Is it about Malachite?"

"...Yeah."

"Can I help?" She asked, meeting Lapis' eyes with an intensity that she had rarely seen before.

Lapis grabbed at her head, the sound of Jasper's voice telling Steven about how dangerous she was echoing in her mind. "I'm sorry."

Lapis squeezed her eyes shut, wanting to forget who she was beside,wanting to forget who she was hurting, wanting to forget… that she cared. "Please, just tell me what's wrong!" Amethyst yelled, grabbing her shoulders.

Lifting her head wearily, Lapis said the words that had been resting heavily on her shoulder for the past couple months. "I don't know if I love you because you're you, or because...you're like _her_."

Amethyst paused, her hand dropping from her shoulder. Her eyes were open wide, and Lapis couldn't read them. "Has she ever shared her donuts with you?"

"What?"

"Has she shared donuts with you?" Amethyst repeated, a sort of grim determination in her tone.

"No." Lapis replied. When would have ever? On the way to Homeworld and back, she had been a prisoner, only meeting her during interrogations and when they got to earth their only experience as individuals was the conversation before they fused.

"Has she ever woken you up from a nightmare, or showed you the boardwalk?"

"Of course not. Why would she? She only wanted to use me to be stronger, to be...Malachite." And as she said it, she realised what Amethyst was getting at. Amethyst was nothing like Jasper. She was kind and funny and liked her...because Lapis was Lapis, not because of what she could do.

"That's my point, L. If we fused, we wouldn't be like Malachite. We'd be something better." Amethyst said, grabbing her hand softly. Her thumb traced circles on the back of her hand and briefly Lapis wondered what color they would be.

"Let's fuse."

 **Author's note: This chapter killed me to write it. It was hard to get a feel for Lapis' personality, which is why it took until Alone at sea to write this. Also, I plan on writing another story about Pearl and Rose's relationship, so if you have any theories, Rose related or not, drop em here. Thanks for reading.**


	5. Pearl 2

Pearl didn't have much to do on those days when the world was quiet. She was never behind on chores, and Steven was often out on his own, leaving her at the temple. Garnet would wander off on her own, while Amethyst would either tag along with Steven and Connie, or as she had been doing more and more, go to the barn with Lapis. Of course, now she had another option besides reorganizing her room: Peridot.

She placed the plate that she had been drying back into the cupboard, and pulled the plug from the sink. It gave her a certain sense of satisfaction to know that the house was clean as she walked out onto the beach, and began the walk to the barn. Although it wasn't particularly long, it wasn't a quick walk either. Amethyst usually shapshifted and flew there, but Pearl preferred the walk, as it gave her about half an hour to herself before she arrived.

She wondered how homesick Peridot was; there was no question of if. When Rose had first declared war on Homeworld, it had gotten so bad for Pearl that she tried to visit once, which only led to an unnecesary battle and a crushed warp pad. Pearl's devotion had been hardwired, not earned and she was unsure what the nature of Peridot's loyalty was from. It must've hurt to break it.

As she began the trek up the hill towards the barn, she could smell the heavy scent of burning rubber and melting plastic. A wave of worry washed over her, and she picked up her pace. She heard Peridot shout, and then she was running, the barn soon raising over the hilltop.

"Peridot?" She yelled, trying to keep the panic out of her voice. What if she had blown herself up, or burned down the barn or- "Are you okay?" She yelled again, slowing down to avoid running into the door. Smoke was slowly escaping through the wood. Pearl carefully opened the door and peered in.

She couldn't see anything. The whole room was filled with smoke, and although a lot of it escaped through the hole in the barn, it wasn't enough to clear the air. She produced light from her gem and pushed forward, careful to keep an eye out for the flame. "Peridot?" She yelled again. This time she could hear a faint yell in repsonse.

The 'meep morps' along the walls were getting stained by soot, but none of them seemed to be melting. At least, not the ones near the front of the barn. The loft was empty, she noted as she passed by, but the TV and Camp Pining Heart tapes were gone. As she neared the back of the barn, she could feel a strong heat, and she slowed to a stop. "Peridot?" She called again.

This time she could clearly hear the response. Peridot yelled from behind her. "Help me get the Meep Morps out!" The green gem ran past her, grabbing the alien/moose head from the wall and the chest of clothing from beside it before darting out again. Or at least, attempting to. The chest was too heavy for her to run with, reducing her speed to a slow walk as she dragged it. Pearl picked up the other side of it and they quickly pulled it from the burning barn.

"What's going on?" She demanded as Peridot ran past her again. Pearl followed her inside, as close to her as she could get without running into her.

"Not now! I'll tell you when we get everything out." Peridot barked, grabbing posters off of the wall and grabbing Lapis' blanket. Pearl frowned and grabbed her arm, pulling her back and forcing her to stop.

"I need to know _now._ " Pearl said, squatting down to her hieght. "Before the barn burns down."

A piece of wood from the ceiling fell down, as if to prove her point.

Peridot surveyed the room as she explained, hands grabbing and readjusting the posters as she shifted her weight nervously. "I was experimenting with the internet connector," The repurposed lawnmower, Pearl noted as she continued. "And I realised that the combustible liquid used for power could start small fires, like the campfire in Camp Pining Hearts. So I built one, but it's growing out of control and _that's_ we need to hurry up and go _now._ " Peridot pulled away and ran back out into the clearing.

Pearl remembered the barrels of gasoline that had been stored in the barn when they were building the drill. Peridot was barely ten feet from the barn outside, and the explosion would be at least 200 feet wide, and would spread much farther due to the crops. She had to find them before the fire reached them, or else Beach city, not to mention themselves, would be set ablaze. She pulled an empty can from it's hook before stumbling deeper into the smoke. She called back to Peridot, "Get as far away as you can! Forget the stuff." She nearly tripped over the toilet, causing some of the water to splash onto her. She shivered. It was clean, she had to remind her self as she bent over, dipping the bucket into the water. She wasn't sure what good it would do against the fire, but it was better than nothing.

She walked into the densest area of smoke, holding the bucket of water in front of her like a shield agains the heat and continued forward. A memory of a similar time with Rose came to mind as she found the burning tire, and stood before it.

OoOoOoOoO

 _Rose wasn't there. The rest of the camp had assembled by the emergency check point, a cave about a mile from camp. All of the humans were there, even the injured ones. Bismuth held one in her arms as she waited for the human healer to get to her. Amethysts, and Rubies mumbled to each other, as Pearls and Quartzes reunited with their friends. But Rose was not found amoungst them. Pearl shifted nervously._

 _She could just be late. She could've stopped to save an animal, or to get war plans before she escaped. Or, as another part of her mind suggested, she could still be at camp, retreated into her gem and vulnerable to heat. Garent caught her nervous gaze and nodded her head._ Go.

 _Pearl directed the Topaz to Bismuth, and then disappearred into the trees. She ran back, her pace about three miles an hour, which got her to camp in about four minutes._ I'm not fast enough. _She thought to herself, as she ran into the blaze. The fire was rapidly consuming the tents and wooden houses, leaving the human village in ruins. She tried not to think about who could've lived there, or how their winter would be without the supplies that were burning away. It wasn't hard to do either; Rose's wellbeing was all that she wanted to think about._

 _She paused outside of Rose's room, the chief's house. The walls were partially stone, but the majority of it was wood. Wood that was burning rapidly. Pearl didn't hesitate to kick the door down, before running inside. The fire burned hotly, but the heat was not nearly as intense as Bismuth's furnace was, but it was still uncomfortable, and still dangerous. She gave a cursory search of the first room, and found nothing of importance in there; if important ceremonial clothing burned, so be it._

 _She ran into the next room, the council room in which Rose had planned her strategies in. Datapads were strewed along the table and floor, and Pearl scrambled to pick them up and shove them into her gem. When the room was clear, she closed the door and checked the last room. There was nothing inside at first glance, but the room left her with an uneasy feeling. Pearl brushed soot from her face, and pulled the cover from the bed. Nothing. She lifted the rug, and tore paintings from the walls. Nothing._

 _It was only as she neared the window that she noticed the footsteps in the dirt, nearly covered by the ash that had begun to pile up. She kicked the window and dove through it, sustaining more than a few scratches on her body as she stood up and dusted off her clothes. She ran past the flames, and followed the footsteps into the forest._

 _OoOoOoOoO_

Pearl tossed the water onto the floorboards around it and tried to spread some on the walls and around the gas. The tire's flame didn't even flicker. Dirt. She needed dirt to put that out. But dirt would require effort and time that she couldn't spare. Instead, she splashed the remainder of the water around the barrels of gasoline, before turning back to refill it.

What if this did get out of hand? Whose fault would it be? Who would mourn afterwards?

Pearl doused the fire on the walls, and the smoke began to lessen. Quickly, she grabbed the barrel and started to drag it towards the door. It was only half full, and the lid was on tightly, allowing her to move it quickly and with minimum caution. The metal caught on a floorboard as she passed by the ladder to the loft, and she yanked it out of it's grasp. Finally, she pulled it out into the daylight. She looked around quickly for Peridot, and found the green gem to be missing.

What if this had been a decoy by Homeworld, or Jasper ot the Rubies? What if they had won because of her actions? What if…

Pearl gave the barrel one final push before running back inside. The walls were charred, and though the smoke had decreased signifigantly, there was still enough to hinder her sight. She picked the toilet tank up, and poured the water on the floor around her. If she was lucky, it would deter the flames from trapping her between them. Carefully, she began to push the barrel. The metal screeched against the wood and she hated to think about how it was affecting it. Not that it would matter if she couldn't put out the fire.

She gave the barrel a final push, bringing it out of the doorway. Instead of moving forward as she had expected, it rocked, and a stream of gas leaked out into the soil. She froze. If the fire came out here, it could still blow up. Pearl continued to push the barrel, moving it as far away as she could before going back for the second. As she pushed the barrel away, Peridot ran through the fields into the flames, Amethyst and Lapis behind her.

She had the choice to go back or keep pushing. Pearl's fingers stiffened on the warm metal. The bucket was thirty feet away; it should be far enough. Doubtful, she pulled her hands away. Peridot was back inside the flames. As well as the others. If she had been wrong, they could all die.

Pearl stopped thinking about it and ran into the burning barn. Thinking got her in trouble. Thinking made her mess up. Thinking, she frowned grimly, could get them all shattered, or worse, melted. In fact, Pearl was not thinking so hard, she ran into Amethyst, who was carrying an armful of stuffed animals out onto the field.

She offered Pearl a small smile as she gathered the stuffed animals again, and ran out into the fields. "Peridot?" She called tentatively, pausing in the middle of the barn. The floorboards were pleasently warm beneath her feet.

The green gem smiled at her as she ran past, offering a jumbled sentence about how Lapis was putting the fire out as she carried the toilet to the grass. Pearl didn't move. What was she supposed to do now? All of her worrying had accomplished nothing; she would've been more helo if had've listened to Peridot.

Peridot ran back in, stopping to grab Pearl's hand and pull her out to the grass.

The short gem looked up through her visor, eyes full of worry, and wrapped her arms around Pearl's waist. "Are you okay? I was worried when I didn't see you out here."

That was almost the same thing that Rose had said to her, when she had finally caught up, as if her worrying was inconsequential.

OoOoOoOoO

 _The footsteps had led her back into the forest, and past another village before circling back to the cave. The entirety of the Crystal gems saw her approach, a dark blue blush on her face as she approached Rose. Her pink dress was unstained and unwrinkled, as if she had returned from a leisurely walk, and not a village fire._

 _Her brow was pursed in concern, as if Pearl was the one who had been missing from role call. As if Pearl was fool for going back needlessly. "Pearl….," Rose began, reaching out to brush away a black stain on her gem. Pearl didn't move, unable to reject her advances and yet too embarressed to concede fully. "Pearl, you had me worried. I didn't see you out here."_

 _Pearl sank into her embrace, even as Garnet, and Topaz and Bismuth stared at her questioningly, as if confused at her silence. It wasn't fair that the worrier, was worried about, she thought, as everyone stared._

OoOoOoOoOoO

"I'm fine." She replied, pressing a chaste kiss to her gem before walking back down the hill to the temple. "Move those cans away from the barn." She added, leaving Peridot in utter confusion as her home burned down.


End file.
